When we arrived we found minimal preparations at the church and few people around. We were directed to the pastor’s home where the bride and groom were waiting. They were just having some tea when we walked in. Our job was to help her get dressed. As we waited for them to finish their “tea”, we visited with the guest pastor who would be officiating the ceremony. We began to learn about the families of these young people. The bride’s family is unsaved. Most of the groom’s family is also unsaved. He is the only one in his family to have a wedding, everyone else just “eloped” (began living with their spouse). The bride’s family was not really thrilled about a wedding and would have had her just “elope”. They didn’t even care to have a celebration at their home as is customary. So the pastor’s home was the home base for her that day.
As we greeted local church leaders we began to see the full picture of this day. There were three funerals in the village that day, plus another one in a neighboring village where the pastor was from. When there is a funeral in the village it affects everyone. Many are related and will attend the burial or at least sit with the family in mourning for a part of the three days. Yesterday they buried a young boy who had died suddenly, today they buried a young father whose appendix had burst and treatment came to late, tomorrow they will bury an old man who was murdered by the mob for his involvement in witchcraft.
We eventually started the service. It was not a full church because of many who were at the respective funerals of family members. It was an awesome testimony to this village to have the bride and groom escorted by choirs from the pastor’s home to the church. As they sang everyone that we passed in the village stopped what they were doing to watch and even cheer the couple on. It was sad that the bride’s parents weren’t there to give her away, but several distant relatives who worship came to the service and joined in the singing.
We finished and headed to the pastor’s home where our lunch station was. Other invited guests and choirs and church members had different stations where they ate and had the celebratory drink – togwa. After lunch we had a choice to make. Do we continue with the celebration when just a few houses away they are getting ready to bury the young man? Or do we first attend the funeral and then finish the party at the groom’s family home? Or do I leave and head home while the locals finish it up?
In the end we decided to go to the gravesite and then the party would continue. Sadly the deceased had no religious affiliation, so there were no choirs, singing or sermons at the funeral. They just brought the body in from town where he had passed away in the hospital and then let those gathered walk by and view the body. Then they headed to the gravesite. This is a large village the graveyard was almost a mile away. There were nearly 1,000 people gathered at that gravesite. There was no sermon to hear or prayers spoken, just many friends and family members wailing as they lowered the coffin into the ground. Some showed up at the gravesite to fulfill a respectful duty, including myself. Others in support of friends, and others who were truly mourning. How sad it was to bury someone who had no hope. Below you can see a portion of the crowd following the car with the coffin toward the gravesite.
We walked back in the dust and hot sun with hundreds of others. We then bid the newlyweds and other pastors good-bye before starting our journey home. Today was not a typical wedding celebration, yet, it was a great testimony to the families and village of the bride and groom. This was one of the biggest funerals I have ever attended and yet one of the saddest because he did not have hope. Such a contradiction of events and lives all wrapped up in one long day.
1 comment:
What a great testimony they have. If you see them again, tell them I am going to share their testimony with someone else who will be blessed by it. Thanks for sharing it with us! Thank you for your ministry of support for these young people in their godly choice making with pressure to make different decision than God would desire. You are a blessing Brook!
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