Love is Blind

That was the phrase I desperately tried to get across to my young friend today.  I was asked by her parents and friends to talk to her.  She is engaged to a young man who is not a Christian and like to hang out at the bar. They are talking about just eloping rather than having a wedding.  This is what brought her into my foreground.  No wedding, running off in shame, marrying someone that isn’t a Christian, etc….  Her father was at a wedding with me yesterday and I could see the pain in his heart as he remembered the situation in his own home.

Who am I to have such sway in her life? Maybe no one, but as the Youth Advisor I may be able to advise her.  Her parents are beside themselves.  If they refuse to let this engagement happen, she will run off behind their backs anyways (or so they think).  But if the young man isn’t saved, they don’t want her to marry him.

He seems to be deceiving her and telling her that he usually is faithful to church in his home town but recently has had a lot of extra business going on.  He is explaining away the wedding by saying he cannot raise enough money for the festivities.

But as I listened to her parents and friends, I saw their pain. They tried to prevent it but so far it is still moving forward. What can they do?  So I sat for hours in this home visiting with the family, having lunch and having a heart to heart with my young friend.  I don’t know if she will heed the advice, but I had to try.  I asked her to not be angry with me for voicing my concerns and she said she could never be upset about someone giving advice.  But as we talked and gave examples of people in her own life that have rough marriages, she agreed that she wanted a good marriage.  She teared up as we spoke about what seemed like a dangerous situation. 

I know it may hurt her heart now but better to grieve a little now rather than get into a horrible situation and have so much more pain.  I encouraged her to wait on the Lord and to rest on the fact that He is bigger than any situation.  He can bring her a great husband, so why settle for this one that seems “iffy”. 

So I pray for her to take that painful step but I have no idea what she will do.  In a few weeks, maybe I will hear that she eloped.  Or maybe I will hear that she broke it off.  Love is blind and often we get so twitter pated that we don’t see the snares that we are walking into.